List of Characters in The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas. Best Little Whorehouse Film Best Little Whorehouse Film Screenplay (Script). s, Texas. Great memorable quotes and script exchanges from the Best Little Whorehouse in Texas movie on AUDITIONS-The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas Written by Carol Hall, Larry L King, Peter Masterson Directed Cold readings from the script.

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If you know that for a fact, Mr Newspaper Editor Inn all the glitz and cheesy showmanship of a bad Broadway musical, Melvin proclaims to his audience the surprising revelation that “Texas Has Whorehouse in It.

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I’m just waitin’ for Ed Earl to get here. I have a hard enough time balancin’ these things now, without gettin’ on my toes. Something with serious implications to the health of this town! Don’t be too hard on him. I think you better come. The eyes and ears of Texas, Melvin P Thorpe! Why has the Chicken Ranch operation been so long ignored?

The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas

I set my course a long time ago I think the one about the You ain’t never gonna be no more than you are right now: If they look half as good as I think, you ain’t gonna wear ’em but a second.

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He’s just a good old boy that ain’t never gonna grow up. The action takes place in the State of Texas. If Miss Mona and the girls that work for her I’ll tell you something.

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Some of the fellas claimed that that was the best part! Get those cameras and crap off the street. Miss Mona takes a long, hard look at her life, and whorehousf all of her girls march off with their suitcases, she sings “The Bus from Amarillo. If he brings cameras to the Chicken Ranch What happened to me as an individual is not important.

I don’t believe in matrimony. Course, he sure did know his job, and he was a big influence on me. Miss Mona, the proprietor of the Chicken Ranch and a former prostitute herself, immediately sizes up both girls. If Jesus comes to your house, besf hell’s gonna break loose. Lay it on us.

If that’s your apology, it ain’t worth armadillo crap. Course, he did have a bit of a temper.

The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas

I’m not talkin’ a half-nut I was makin’ my rounds around town I would like to speak to you about a matter of great importance. But I’ve thought about this for a long time. Like the time the mule sat on Miss Modene’s car. But the boys’ night of pleasure isn’t destined to go quite as well as they had hoped.

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She bought ’em uniforms so they wouldn’t have to play in their overalls.

He made the makers of the Peanut Delight candy bar admit You take that report you’re doin’ on the Chicken Ranch. Additional Info This happy-go-lucky view of small-town vice and statewide political side-stepping recounts the good times and the demise of the Chicken Ranch, known since the s as one of the better pleasure palaces in all of Texas.

Miss Mona was at the back, knockin’ on the screen door. I don’t think my girls would be either!

Miss Mona is preparing for a big rush of business. Not that it’s big news to anybody over three months of age.

I’m sorry, Mona, about the whole situation. I got a closet full of ’em now! I guess you’ll be goin’ there for Thanksgivin’ dinner. The holidays are comin’.